• A sense of belonging

    Please note: this story references self harm and suicide.

    I remember the dazed, sickly feeling; the heat of the hospital and the incandescent fear. It had faded slightly on arrival, lurking in the background like a toothache slightly subdued by aspirin. I was angry too, at having made mistakes – big ones and bad ones that would change my life. A lot of the crazy things I had done were because of delusions, but also because of the fear of ending up in a ...

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    Tags:
    dealing with past experiences,
    psychosis,
    survival,
    self harm,
    putting others at risk
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  • Strange

    Please note this story references suicide and self harm

    Going to work every day when you've been thinking of suicide and cutting yourself the night before is strange. People asking how you are. Wanting to tell them, wanting to give them a reason why you've been so scatty and struggled to remember things. It gives me a sense of shame not feeling like I'm fully excelling at work because it is my near only form of social interaction and that is how ...

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    Tags:
    depression,
    college,
    suicidal thoughts,
    work,
    self harm
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  • Sleeves

    Please note: this piece references self-harm. I don’t wear my heart on my sleeve – never have. Instead, I keep it closely guarded, hidden discreetly. For years, my sleeves were a hiding place, not for my heart – but for secret hurts on skin, written deeply . But now, wearing what I like I hide my hurts next to my heart. And though I think about them I’m trying my best not to feel.

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    Tags:
    anxiety,
    depression,
    recovery,
    self harm
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  • Self Harm.it's double edged

    Please Note: This piece contains references to self harm Self harm relief and grief. It took me a long time to realise how much of a doubled edged sword cutting myself was. I'd do it and feel better, lighter, freer and then in the morning the recriminations would start. How do I hide it from family? How deep is the cut? How big will the scar be? Shame, fear and the big question; was it ...

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    Tags:
    hope,
    self harm,
    light
  • Dear Self Harm

    Dear Self Harm, I know we've had this conversation before, But this time I'm throwing you out the door, I tried in the past but didn't want to be rude, For after all you had done me such good. I appreciate that you've been my friend, But now I'm afraid it has to end, I cannot keep you here by my side, There were times you almost let me die! There were times when you ...

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    Tags:
    recovery,
    self harm,
    success
  • 1 year on - my self harm recovery story (so far!)

    Warning: This piece contains references to self harm 18/11/2015 Today is an important date for me. It marks an important anniversary and an achievement which I am immensely proud of myself for managing to accomplish. It’s not the date I graduated from uni, or found a job, home, pet or significant other. Nor is it the kind of anniversary people usually make a fuss about or celebrate in the public eye. But it is a ...

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    Tags:
    long post,
    recovery,
    self love,
    self harm,
    personal
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  • A Poem About Self Harm (May Trigger)

    Silver Red Running Dead Sharp Straight Beauty Hate

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    Tags:
    Poem,
    self harm
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  • Emotions

    Emotional waves of razors and glass Thick, heavy darkness that will not pass Trapped alone in a metal barred head Going through the motions of the already dead Unseen through layers of disguises and masks Allowing the program to complete daily tasks Anxious enough to jump out of my skin Don't know where the parts end and where I begin Feeling like a child and looking like a freak No hope and no care, the ...

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    Tags:
    depression,
    emotions,
    suicidal thoughts,
    poem,
    self harm