• Up front

    Conflict is burning my soul from the inside outWithout a doubt, there is a false power in existence A power that can't be taken lightlyYet shouldn't even be worth a second glanceWhere is my own stubbornness I hear the ghosts cry For some variety, I must source, I can't even discreetly channel that emotion on the slyDestruction is not my end game, not even my firstI hold what's dear to meHowever overwhelmingly, I always seem to veer towards ...

    read more
    Tags:
    self-management,
    recovery journey,
    Help,
    Darkness,
    honesty
    • 0
    • 0
    • 2
    • 0
  • Prescribed.

    20mg. 40mg.30mg.20mg.Now 10mg.The reduction in anti-depressant dosage has begun. I'm so scared. Each time this has happened, I experience the worst lows ever. I can't get up, get washed or care about the things I usually do. I'm exhausted, upset and annoyed. After this though, I feel great. I level out and feel joy again. I enjoy things, I get up earlier, I feel more together. The anticipation for this should push aside any negativity or fear ...

    read more
    Tags:
    medication,
    depression,
    anti-depressants,
    Recovery,
    recovery journey
    • 2
    • 1
    • 2
    • 2
  • Star Check

    Today's an ending. The last of my Write to Recovery sessions. And while it may seem final, I want to remind myself that although the sessions may have ended I shouldn't stop with the things that I have learnt, experienced or morph into the person I am becoming.In here I've been able to take off my mask and bare all to my fellow writers. I might have to readorn my mask in the outside world ...

    read more
    Tags:
    taking control,
    self-knowledge,
    recovery journey,
    self help
    • 1
    • 2
    • 1
    • 0
  • Personal roads

    Follow the yellow brick road...or the red one,or the blue. Find a dirt road with no bricks. Find a green road that’s not been stepped on yet. Don’t follow. Sit down and have a break. Take a nap in the sun. Go back to collect that pebble you liked. The PATH isn’t going anywhere, you are...and you will get there anyway - you just get to choose how. So make it a good one FOR YOU. 

    read more
    Tags:
    self-knowledge,
    recovery journey,
    Self-compassion,
    choices
    • 0
    • 1
    • 2
    • 1
  • Double Heartedness

       I am becoming 'a have' and I am becoming 'a have not' as I go in and out of recovery like a bleatinglamb. Slipping and sliding backwards and forwards from health to illness varying my condition as acitizen.   I can feel the economy moving around me with my well being adjacent on a separate parallel line. As I,like everyone, am subject to the ups and downs of the times. Two heart ...

    read more
    Tags:
    hope,
    fear,
    recovery journey
    • 0
    • 0
    • 3
    • 1
  • Identifying Justice For and In Myself

    Making peace with all that is right in Man and with the Divine can be a daunting but rewarding life's work, spiritually. However, materially the mental health sufferer finds he is automatically at odds with the working world. He is viewed as “out of shape“, from the economic point of view and yet able to work. So how will he survive? How will he cope? Will his unique, personal work be recognized? Or will he ...

    read more
    Tags:
    stigma,
    Answers/Solutions,
    justice,
    recovery journey
  • My Spiritual Recovery Experience

    My spiritual recovery has four aspects: 1. I do not have to be ill to lead an unreal or untrue life. 2. I do not have to be well to lead a real or true life. 3. I can be unreal or untrue due to the complexities of my illness. 4. I can be real and true about the complexities of my illness. 1. It seems to me vast posses of people are able to ...

    read more
    Tags:
    spiritual emergence,
    depression,
    recovery journey
  • Grateful

    I had a dream that I was really suicidal and self harming and my support worker was trying to help me. He ran after me when I went to try and kill myself and he asked nurses and doctors to help but they all said 'tell her to pray.' Even when his shift had ended he was there for me. He was the only one who cared. I had this dream after having a review ...

    read more
    Tags:
    support,
    recovery journey,
    dream,
    grateful