Flood Barriers


Flood Barrier -14/7/14

What is there now, to be taken at the flood?

My life is bound in shallow and though pleasing streams

I mourn there seems no larger sea for me to sail or find new land

I'm at that time of life when, while not OLD as such

I realise there's more behind me than there is ahead

And daring deeds take less than second-place to smaller acts of empathy
instead.

Am I condemned only just to drip away the stone around my neck?

But not divert the river; much less tame the sea

Like King Canute I try to turn the tide - yet still I find my riverbed
runs dry

Is there any consolation in the capacity for good?

Then it should surely not be metered out or measured

In such short supply.

Why did I write this?
I'm frustrated. I'm tired of finding doors slammed in my face. I feel like the invisible woman and so bloody middle-aged. I just want to be able to make use of my experiences. It may not make total sense of everything but at least the pain would not be wasted. I don't have the time to twat about, because nobody does. Is it so wrong to want more? My workplace sucks, but that's ok, I can live with that because that is why they pay me. God knows I wouldn't go near if I wasn't paid to do so. What is grinding my gears is that there is so much more to me, stuff I believe could help others but no way of harnessing it, utilising it, making a contribution to the world. The world is not interested and the realisation of how small, how insignificant, how pointless life seems is seriously boiling my irn bru.

Add your reaction
  • 0
  • 0
  • 0
  • 0

The Phoenix

THE PHOENIX Just because the leaves are falling it doesn't mean the tree is dying It only means it's time to cast The tired things to the Earth The sun may have got weaker but there will be another summer We have to die a little to get rea...

read more
Tags:

Twenty-twenty vision

I was at work (not a place usually associated with flashes of insight but hey) when it occurred to me that actually, I had been very ill indeed and even I had not been aware just how ill - or for how long. I was completing my usual tasks and f...

read more
Tags:

The injustice of not being heard, seen, validated.

I remember one day in primary school. It must have had quite the impact because I've never forgotten it (40 odd years later, give or take ;-)We were doing some sort of spelling/geography quiz....name a place and ask someone to spell ...

read more
Tags:
anger,
childhood
  • 2
  • 0
  • 1
  • 1

My Experience of Anger to Date...

I haven't felt anger for years, I've managed to numb myself from it.  I was always told to not get angry! A forbidden emotion when I was growing up.  If I did get angry, I was made to feel completely and utterly ashamed w...

read more
Tags:
Hope,
Anger
  • 1
  • 0
  • 1
  • 1

The Deepest Sorrow

I wish I felt anything but anger when I see a pregnant woman, affectionately caressing the home in which her baby grows safely. Pain wears the veil of anger so as not to be seen. It buries itself deep in the heart of me where it is safe fr...

read more
Tags:
depression,
anger
  • 0
  • 1
  • 2
  • 0