The Dimensions And Structure Of My Psychosis

At the centre of my affliction lie all my paranoid fears. From the tiniest of unreal-isms to the greatest.

Moreover the foundation of my mind is shaken regularly by “Someone” who hates me.

That “person, spirit or thought” could evolve from me or come from others. It might be an impression that has developed awry according to the accepted reality of the outside world. It is always cruel and troublesome.

This forces my artistic imagination to over exaggerate and malfunction as it attempts to articulate a message of explanation from the episodes it senses.

A lame but important attribute of my mind shouting out about life. Too sensitive and too sore. I am scared I will not make sense of it.

Yes, someone or something must have injured me with a succession of events at crucial times of my development and my response was to become ill.

I do not remember exactly how or when, or how many blows or traumas have contributed. It is an open wound and scares me to pieces. Ironically, I don't blame or accuse anyone except superficially.

I tend to accept it as my lot though I get frustrated and angry with myself at times. Luckily love has always taken advantage over the hatred I could feel in return.

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