My time was consumed with surviving and, on occasion, still is.
To survive I must take the magic bullet, one that courses through my body annihilating everything awake, only those who slumber survive. There comes a time of awakening in my body and then both mind and body must strive to survive. My every unshot cell wants to live, at this discovery point, I thrive! I am altered but I continue to thrive into my new existence, I live, I am alive, I am NOT dying - only the bullet tells lies of death and to store that as a truism is the act of surviving. I am here, I am now but to live a life alongside that chemo murderer can be cruel but with the means to be kind.
Mastering survival has always been my game, I am sure you would be proud of my survival accomplishments but this, this is the ultimate game, if I crack the code then I am on to a winner and winning is surviving. I won the gold, I'm on the podium, I truly have thrived in my survival and now, only now, can I enter my recovery. Oh! To be gentle and lovely and kind and beautiful and dare I say it .... happy.
The bullet's back and here I am, writing to know, to remember, to replenish .... that hope of recovery.
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