I saw entities on the wall and they were coming for me.
Creeping up behind me, merging with my shadow,
Waiting to engulf me and carry me away.
I saw them dance across the ceiling and swirl above my head
I thought I heard them whisper in my ear but when I turned my head to see them they were gone.
Later on they came back louder!
I heard them as they rumbled from inside my head,
and from the depths of my gut they began to roar,
but when I clasped my hands over my ears and they got louder still,
I knew that they were inside me from the start and I had simply awoken them.
They were no ones ghosts but my own.
Nothing to fear but myself.
And then they were gone.
In their wake my messengers left an eruption of trauma and grief so strong that depression and emotional instability reared its ugly head once again, which eventually led to alcoholism, anxiety disorder, and a vicious cycle of self abuse, peppered with colourful, seductive, but migraine inducing, dots of hypomania.
It has taken me 3 fragmented years of therapy and 6 years in total to whittle it down to a mild sugar addiction, daily anxiety and varying degrees of depression with bouts of agoraphobia.
These are the demons that remain and I am starving those parasites out.
- This Moved Me
- Thanks for Sharing
- This Helped Me