If I could go back in time I would.
Abortion is a big thing, no woman should feel forced into doing that but every woman has the right todo what she likes with her body without being judged but sadly it happened to me , sadly I was having to choose between killing an 10 week fetus or letting it survive. I was 18 at the time, i had bunk beds with my sister, hardly brining in good money and the dad didn’t want to be in it’s life so I was stuck, I just wanted a miracle to happen for me to win the lottery just something so I could keep this heart beat inside me, I wanted everyone to stop telling me that I need to get rid off it.
The one thing that broke my heart was my dad, my dad started calling me names like slag, hoe for getting pregnant, he would tell me get rid off it or your getting kicked out and I use to look at him and think I am your daughter, I love you so why can’t you love me and accept that this has happened but realise that I would bring something to this earth that would love you dearly aswell, that’s the one thing that hurt me truly and one thing I’ll never forget.
Weeks went by and I decided having a abortion was best for everyone else I was thinking about every human being that said get rid off it, I wasn’t thinking about me or how I would feel, I had this beautiful thing growing inside me that I would love so much and I know she/he would love me back, a bond that I’ve always wanted, attention that I’ve always wanted and this little thing growing inside me could give me that.
I cried my eyes out while I was taking the pill and I cried my eyes out when I walked out of the clinic, I didn’t care I wanted the whole world to see how cruel I was, how evil I felt, I felt like god hated me, he gave me a beautiful thing so why did I destroy it. I hated every single being, I hated everyone.
I remember washing up and feeling a very big blood clot coming out so I ran to the toilet and that was it, that was my baby. I cried my eyes out, my heart went so cold, I felt powerless I just wanted him/her back growing inside me. I’ve never experienced pain like that before and I never want to experience it again. I said a prayer and told him/her that mommy loves you and she’ll see you in heaven soon❤️
Some of you may call me crazy, stupid, silly as it was only a fetus but that was my baby, the baby I got forced to get rid off, the baby that I loved but no one could understand how I was feeling and honestly I wish that on no one! My daughters will never feel forced todo anything because women need to be heard and respected! I as a woman understand that abortion is good and bad in many ways but I lost something that I would’ve loved so please don’t force your wife, girlfriend, daughter, cousin, granddaughter, friend to have an abortion because it’s affected my life in many ways so please don’t do it to there life!
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