Straggler

Its been 8 years. 8 long years...
How have I survived this long?
The urge to end it all comes and goes, yet when I reach my highest, I am still unhappy.
I should be happy, not much is going wrong in my life and most things are going right. I work nights, earning my meals while dragging my heels, alright money. My parents are there for me and I have 3 very good friends that I see often. 29% of young males have some form of mental illness and it just so happens that I am one of them.

Give me something to kill numbness I feel everyday, a pill or cream or something to make me feel normal again. I was happy once, back when I was running around the cul de sac with my friends. The warm memories I once knew are still there but I can't remember the feelings I felt during them, they've been replaced by how I feel now, empty...

Can't eat, want to sleep all the time, nothing interests me yet my head is always swimming. I need to find my way out of the grey soon because at the moment I'm lost in the void. This doesn't feel like living, its about time I asked for help and swallowed my pride instead of the sleeping pills and alcohol that I planned on taking oh so many years ago.

The wolves are coming and I have no shelter... Straggle on...

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