The Great Big Secret....
So writing my story has helped me to see that I am not fully aware of what actually happened when I was most unwell. I'm sure a combination of factors contribute to this. I'm sure the mind keeps things from us to keep us safe - save us from re-living trauma. I'm also sure that I was pretty doped up on diazepam and other drugs during my inpatient stay. And lastly - my 'episode' was something that just quite simply was not spoken about in my family circle. It was all very hush hush - part of that my fault as there was no way in hell I wanted anyone to know that I was in the psychiatric wards!!! What would people think!!
So what writing my story has helped me to see is that in order to continue moving forward - I need to understand what happened. I need to plug the gaps so I am currently requesting to access my medical notes. This is a huge thing for me because I am literally going to be re-visiting the worst time of my life. It will be interesting to see how it was viewed through the eyes of a "professional". To be continued.....
- This Moved Me
- Thanks for Sharing
- This Helped Me