Bob's Work Shocks

Bob's Work Shocks
My intelligence tells me I can do more while my illness says I can not. I recover to a point then it goes again making it hard to lead a balanced life. I feel like I am always struggling to start and never quite making it. Picking up the bogey prize when I do for running the race in the first place, hoping I will finish it.
" Is this all I can do, repeat my efforts constantly" wonders Bob. He is curious as to why the results do not seem to add up to much. He is sure the world judges them as poor. However he is also sure he puts in great effort which he feels is recognised.
The world and his effort meet when he tries to do paid work. Bob finds jobs , trains , fails many times under escalating pressures, rests , recovers and does it all over again.
It is a shocking experience to be prepared, ready and willing over and over again. It takes its toll and he has to stop interacting with the job market.
Reflecting he realises the work place does not speak the language of mental health.Why should it, employers assume 100% fitness. How can they allow for the productivity he is capable of under the right conditions tailored to meet his need ?
He is right in thinking that it is a taboo subject which is another shock realisation to cope with.
Candid thoughts he remembers having on the job :
{This is extremely stressful and the learning curve is very steep. I feel very alone with the tasks I need to full fill due to the stress. At times I am hardly able to cope in this environment.I am not made for this industry. All industry is a challenge in whatever I try to do yet I hate unemployment. I guess my recovery has to be more stable for a longer period of time to withstand the pressure to succeed. Its a nerve racking experience but I endure it.}
He reflects again,
The ' can't ' factor runs deep in the work place. Fitness and capability bring in money. Trouble with your health does not unless you are very capable and can hide it. No body can walk into a job declaring poor mental health. All these realisations shock Bob to the core because he has tried very hard with the realities of the economy as it stands today.

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