• Ups and Frowns

    Ups and Frowns Recovery is ongoing,There often is no end,Many things i require,To help my head mend, Life is undulating,Like the geography of the land,Like the cycle of the seasons,Like the weather on my hand, So if nature is ever changing,Why should i be so still,Noting my character & journey,Will take many quivers of the quill, Today's path is more even,My battles far less raw,The result of all I've learnt,From the tools within my drawer, One ...

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  • Love Doesn't Seem A Part Of Me

    Why do I seem so different,From everyone else I see,Smiling, laughing and in love,While I’m partnered with misery Why does my heart beat,At such a slow and irregular pace,Maybe that’s the reason,I’m always last in love’s race Maybe it’s my head that’s to blame,Too anxious and too down,People can’t see past the mask I wear,The one forever painted with a frown It’s bound to lie with the nerves I’ve frayed,Only pulsing with the pain,The hurt, sorrow, grief and ...

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  • Body of Defence

    Body of Defence Why is it that those the closest,Are the ones who hurt us the most,Fall short of the support I showed them,Make me feel invisible, empty like a ghost Why is it that my small family,Keep me tethered to my past,All those days of regret and pain,Haunting memories I wish did not last read more

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  • A Prisoner of Work

    A Prisoner of Work I stand in-front of my second hand mirror, a hand me down from a friend. I’d spent ages polishing the worn walnut frame and once misty glass. I step back to admire it’s transformation. A relict from the past which now helped set off my modern living room with it’s comfy cotton couches and the units that housed all the little mementos of my life so far. Photographs ...

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  • ME-ternity Leave

    ME-ternity LeaveBorn mid December, already a week late but heifers always are according to my Dad. Farming's always come first over family with him so my part in his story seems very much like a sideshow. So how did he shape my story? He pushed me away from farming and his old fashioned views on female roles as subsiduary characters. My Mum reinforced this by telling me to keep my independence and maybe this is ...

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    Tags:
    self-help,
    hope,
    self management,
    me,
    journey
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  • Star Check

    Today's an ending. The last of my Write to Recovery sessions. And while it may seem final, I want to remind myself that although the sessions may have ended I shouldn't stop with the things that I have learnt, experienced or morph into the person I am becoming.In here I've been able to take off my mask and bare all to my fellow writers. I might have to readorn my mask in the outside world ...

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    Tags:
    taking control,
    self-knowledge,
    recovery journey,
    self help
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  • Shoulders are to Blame

    Shoulders are to BlameThe problems I have are all in my head I'm told and up until now that's what I have believed. My brain focusses on the negatives, the self criticism and unhelpful behaviours. But why cant I use it to see the silver linings like I do for others?Or maybe there's another partner in crime? My shoulders. The ones not only carrying the weight of the world, the devil and angel and the ...

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    Tags:
    hope,
    change,
    aspirations,
    new me
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  • Treat or Treatment

    Treat or TreatmentLooking back can be cruel or kind, all depending on the nature of my mind. Retracing past places and faces, including my own younger state.Time though to live in the now, learning about the current me and how, to break free of other's expectations and my own past incarcerations.Whether it's on my own or with aid, knowing that I don't want to just fade, learning to be more self-forgiving, ...

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    Tags:
    happiness,
    me,
    journey,
    joy,
    individuality
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